Copy/Paste Part One.
From Thursday, July 21, 2005.
So, it's my first week back to school. I woke up this morning, it being my 2nd day back. I get dressed, go out to the car, start it and the motherfucker wont move. I'm thinking to myself, 'No, No, NO. I'm not catching the fucking the shool bus. Those bumpy bus rides always make me crack a fat.'
I hop out of the car and check out the front tyres. 'WHAT THE FUCK!!!!@^#@%@' the front right tyre had been punctured! I suppose living in Sydney, the capital of Lebanon, this kind of thing is prone to happen. You always get those little lebs trying to break in or put their 18 month old baby brother's shit in your mailbox. You kind of get used to it, but i had a fucking assessment to do in engineering... and there was only one thing left to do. Catch the Bus.
So im running for the bus, i get on and sit down. They are trialling these new things in Sydney where you just swipe your little card and it deducts money from it. It's a fucking cool thing because i don't have to carry change around like a hobo anymore. Anyways, the bus ride wasn't too bad. I mean i had a boner half the way but that wasn't because of the bus ride... i had a babe from my year sitting next to me. And Oh My Fucking God. I'd tap that shit if it was starting to rot. Well... not really.
Finally i get to school, and soon enough i find out theres no assessment. We are doing some Year 11 Crossroads thing where we get to learn about sex-ed, trust, relaxation, study skills and all that poofters shit.
First session is relaxation. How fucking gay was it do you ask? Yeah, it was so gay i fell asleep. And all the class saw me snoring too. So what's wrong with having a siesta during a relaxation session? Nothing, i say.
Next came Sex Ed. I was sure i'd seen it all. I've seen Goatse, Tubgirl, and all those other sick shit shock sites. But nothing. I repeat, NOTHING could have prepared me for what i saw.
First picture the teacher hands around the class is of a syphilis infected muffburger. I wont go into detail, but has anyone seen a bulldog that's just eaten mayonaise?
Anyhoo, after a shit fucking session seeing mongled vaginas and penis' for an hour, i saw one of the funniest things evar. My mate walks out of the class, as white as a ghost and faints head first to the floor. Haha, and to think im his friend. I stood there and laughed so hard while my other mate put him in the recovery positon. Rofl damn that was a great end to the session.
I think that's about it. Got a lift back home with the bloke that fainted, changed over the tyre on my car with a spare i got my mum to bring home and all was good.
So theres my first post. I'll try blog at least once a month but being me, i'll blog about 3 times then forget to do it for a year and blog again.
btw- i need to finish fixing this chair because this is bullshit.
Cheers
So, it's my first week back to school. I woke up this morning, it being my 2nd day back. I get dressed, go out to the car, start it and the motherfucker wont move. I'm thinking to myself, 'No, No, NO. I'm not catching the fucking the shool bus. Those bumpy bus rides always make me crack a fat.'
I hop out of the car and check out the front tyres. 'WHAT THE FUCK!!!!@^#@%@' the front right tyre had been punctured! I suppose living in Sydney, the capital of Lebanon, this kind of thing is prone to happen. You always get those little lebs trying to break in or put their 18 month old baby brother's shit in your mailbox. You kind of get used to it, but i had a fucking assessment to do in engineering... and there was only one thing left to do. Catch the Bus.
So im running for the bus, i get on and sit down. They are trialling these new things in Sydney where you just swipe your little card and it deducts money from it. It's a fucking cool thing because i don't have to carry change around like a hobo anymore. Anyways, the bus ride wasn't too bad. I mean i had a boner half the way but that wasn't because of the bus ride... i had a babe from my year sitting next to me. And Oh My Fucking God. I'd tap that shit if it was starting to rot. Well... not really.
Finally i get to school, and soon enough i find out theres no assessment. We are doing some Year 11 Crossroads thing where we get to learn about sex-ed, trust, relaxation, study skills and all that poofters shit.
First session is relaxation. How fucking gay was it do you ask? Yeah, it was so gay i fell asleep. And all the class saw me snoring too. So what's wrong with having a siesta during a relaxation session? Nothing, i say.
Next came Sex Ed. I was sure i'd seen it all. I've seen Goatse, Tubgirl, and all those other sick shit shock sites. But nothing. I repeat, NOTHING could have prepared me for what i saw.
First picture the teacher hands around the class is of a syphilis infected muffburger. I wont go into detail, but has anyone seen a bulldog that's just eaten mayonaise?
Anyhoo, after a shit fucking session seeing mongled vaginas and penis' for an hour, i saw one of the funniest things evar. My mate walks out of the class, as white as a ghost and faints head first to the floor. Haha, and to think im his friend. I stood there and laughed so hard while my other mate put him in the recovery positon. Rofl damn that was a great end to the session.
I think that's about it. Got a lift back home with the bloke that fainted, changed over the tyre on my car with a spare i got my mum to bring home and all was good.
So theres my first post. I'll try blog at least once a month but being me, i'll blog about 3 times then forget to do it for a year and blog again.
btw- i need to finish fixing this chair because this is bullshit.
Cheers
posted by Calabrese at 5:16 PM
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